About Me

Hi, I’m Bill Petruzzo, and despite the next eight paragraphs, this website is not about me.

I believe in self expression. I don’t mean necessarily expressing one’s self to the world. No, I more believe in expressing one’s self to God.

Sometime when I was pretty young, I decided that I wanted to be an actor. I enjoyed the thought so much in fact that I partook in an acting camp funded, graciously, by my parents. Although the camp was pretty fun, it didn’t take long before I discovered it was more about singing and dancing than about acting. That experience really underscored my eventual opinion on being an actor. I wanted to express myself, or at least express something anyway. As an actor, I didn’t get to do that, I expressed someone else’s something; so I lost interest.

It wasn’t long before my thrusts for self-expression lead me to purchase a guitar thanks to money my grandmother had left in a fund somewhere. Maybe it was lack of ambition or maybe I was genetically predisposed not to be able to move my fingers fast enough, but the guitar quickly left me frustrated. I wasn’t only not expressing myself, but what I was expressing was off-key and out of any discernable rhythm. I lost interest.

The perfect antithesis of the guitar; this became my new ambition. Growing up, my household has always had a healthy infusion of photography. My father, an amazing photographer himself, always seemed to have his camera at just the right time. One of our favorite past times was sitting in the quiet dining room with only the hum of the photo-projector in the background. “shhhhhhk-chck….” Next slide. It was great. Sitting there watching memories go by on the projection screen. Looking at the pictures made us feel like we were there again. With the help my mother and father, I got my hands onto a high-quality camera and started taking pictures. Many of them were pretty alright, but there was still something missing. What about the music? If only I could play the guitar, then everyone would be able to understand! The emotion just wouldn’t pour out of my photographs the way I wanted it to! Lopsided in my hobby, I lost interest.

Seeking a cure for my ailment, I tried to come up with the solution to this half-expression I was tormented with. All of a sudden, it dawned on me, films incorporate both video and audio into one experience. I thought to myself, “What an expressive life! If I get that life, then they’ll really feel it!” It wasn’t long before my, sometimes too supportive, parents helped me to purchase a very expensive video camera. With the cooperation of friends and family, I started making short films. Of course, now I was presented with a whole new series of problems. Now I needed someone else to express for me what I wanted to express- and they had to do it well! What’s more, it turns out that I didn’t have enough arms to do everything all at once. I came full circle! I was standing on that stage at acting camp again. I had something to express, but now I had to rely on someone else to express it for me! This wasn’t the solution to my problem either.

In the midst of this creative exploration, I made a discovery with eternal consequences. I discovered eternal life. No, not in a fountain of youth type, sci-fi adventure way; I can assure you, I’m going die some day. No, I found the fountain of spiritual youth. It’s in Jesus Christ, and he said something was wrong. For some reason, I had assumed it was okay to express myself. Somewhere along the way I got the idea that I had the right to express myself to the world; that the world even cared. All of a sudden, it was clear, the world doesn’t care. It has no reason to, and it’s selfish of me to expect it to. However all was not lost. In my discovery, I had formed a relationship with the Father who has loved me inside and out, even before I was conceived and like a good father, he always wants to hear what’s on my heart!

I have tried to change my mind, I try to create for him now. I wish to express myself to Him. He doesn’t need music to understand, he doesn’t need the photograph, or the film. He sees my heart and so my expression to him, however it looks, is always understood.

Responses

  1. William,

    It’s great to see you using the gifts God has given you. I’m a mother and grandma, so it’s easy for me to think that God enjoys the little things we give back to Him as much as I treasure all the little bits of art scattered around my house…art that my kids and grandkids made just for me.

    Thanks for sharing your words with the rest of us. It’s amazing how God uses all of us together.

    Enjoy the Son!
    sandy cathcart
    sandycathcart.blogspot.com

  2. Thanks for the bible study links on your blog.

  3. typo in the spelling of thoughts in the bold print above MEMORIES AND THOUGHS..thought you’d want to know

  4. Very well expressed. As a Christian I believe there is an inner need to express to live – only wish I had discovered that years ago! I like your honest blog.

  5. hello! i luv your site, and I’m glad to meet another Christian blogger! stop by mine @ http://scripture4u.wordpress.com
    Keep in the Faith!!
    -neogotchi

  6. Thank you. Your words speak so loud ,the whole church needs to fear the Lord more , so much more,
    May God the Holy Spirit keep inspiring you . We need to hear more, so much more.
    Every blessing in Christ-RUTH

  7. Your honest and bare expression to God the creator is an inspiration to those of us who are also in Christ.

    Have you ever thought about why God moved you to express yourself to Him in this “environment”? Perhaps the impact that you will have on someone who reads your words are why God wants you to express yourself this way.

    God Bless

  8. This is more a reminder to myself to come back, read more and subscrbe. Very late where I’m from

  9. […] William: https://petruzzo.wordpress.com/about-me/ […]

  10. I’ve stumbled upon your blog and “what a joy” to read your book reviews (I’m in the process of reading Piper’s When I Don’t Desire God…yes, quite a different style) your “About Me’ is very wonderful. Praise God for what he’s done in your life and how you are being used through this media. Very encouraging indeed!!

    • I’m pleased to know that someone out there is enjoying the blog. And, I hope you enjoy the rest of the Piper book, it’s a good read! 🙂


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